When Did I Become So Indecisive?

I've had meetings with vendors and known right away if I wanted to sign on the line. I could just tell that they were right for me. It hit me like it did when I knew Mr. Kettle was the man for me. That awesome feeling I felt about my dress and my wedding venue was felt with a couple vendors.

Image via The Gloss

But then... nothing. No pangs of love drawing me in and letting me know I'd found the vendor for me.

Okay, complete honesty. That title is a bit misleading, hive. I'm not a decisive person by nature. I'm opinionated as hell, but most of my friends know that I can be indecisive. When I'm being indecisive, I just want someone to choose for me. But in wedding world, you end up with either pushy relatives or hands-off relatives. I've got this weird mix going.

They offer up all they're opinions and suggestions unsolicited. But when I actually want them to make a decision for me, I get no help. They want to make sure I get what I want and that I'm not being pushed into a decision I'll regret. I love them all so much for that because I know every detail of the day will be exactly how I prefer it.

But when I seriously honestly have no preference, I'm lost!

At least I wasn't lost when it really counted! / Image via A Scrapbook of Memories

I still can't decide between the two florists. Their prices are similar, and we went the same flower selections, so there's no difference. I know I'll love the flowers no matter who does them because I love the options we went with. I'm seriously considering flipping a coin to decide.

I prefer the second DOC (day-of-coordinator) over the first, but that's mostly because her price was $1,000 cheaper. Yeah, you read that right, it's a huge, huge, price  difference. But now my parents are wondering if we really need one.

Momma Kettle knows someone at her job who got married at my venue. The husband said they didn't need a DOC. Of course, they didn't have one. And how often is the groom aware of the details of the day that don't actually get attended to? I asked my mom to get his wife's number so I could ask her.

The decisions that need to be made are piling up. I thought by now I'd be done with all our vendors and able to focus on fun details, like finishing our invitations! I will do a post soon on our final mock up. It's hot and way better than anything I could come up with on my own.

But I'm not done making vendor decisions and I don't know how to get done. The one thing I do know is that I have no desire to meet more vendors in search of that love pang.

How do you make decisions when you're unsure? Is flipping a coin really that bad?

What's The Big Deal About A Day-of-Coordinator?

There's a day-of-coordinator option that was available to us through our first florist interview. She works at the gallery and she's pretty amazing.

In spite of my natural urge to sign on the line with the first person who's offer sounds good, I resisted. Momma Kettle made and appointment with another day-of-coordinator for this week. Her prices are waay better than the first lady, but we'll see how the meeting goes. I'll be happy to report back to the hive, if only to help people in the Chicago area who are looking for coordinators.

I started thinking about why we really needed one though. I know for a fact that we definitely want one. But why? Here are the reasons I came up with:

1. You really get to relax the day of your wedding, no hassles on vendor payments and tracking down family for portraits.
2. Your friends/family get to relax the day of your wedding. They won't be delegated the responsibility of organizing reception flowers or making sure the seating chart is visible and programs are handed out.
3. All your vendors (and your wedding party members) have a one stop shop at which to direct questions
4. If your DOC is awesome, he/she'll be involved before the actual day, helping with the wedding rehearsal and helping create time lines for events.

Having that type of help considering how large our wedding is will likely be completely essential. It's not a wasted expense for our piece of mind. Neither Momma Kettle nor I will have to keep downing champagne all night because someone else will be handling the oops! moments of the day.

Are you going to have/Did you have a DOC? Would you recommend one for a wedding as large as mine?

Configuring The Kettle Tea Party: Wedding Theme

After reading about all the lovely themes that brides come up with for their wedding, I was feeling a bit sad, or maybe just melancholy, that we didn't have a real theme for our wedding. I knew we'd never come up with a concept that would cover the whole wedding weekend because that's just not us.

Ultimately I've been accepting that our wedding will be formal and will be romantic, but it will have a couple of quirky twists to it. One twist is my dress, it's very unexpected. Another twist is having 2s of so many things and having so many people involved. But that's not really a theme, is it?

I didn't think so. Not when there are so many real themes out there. Whether it's color, icon, flavor, or culture, we just didn't have anything like what every other bride seemed to have.

Bird Wedding Theme / Image via Perfect Wedding Zone

Pink Wedding Theme / Image by Anne Ruthmann Photography via TWIS Weddings

Sugar Wedding Theme / Image via Wedding Favors Ideas

Greek Wedding Theme / Image via Lovely Wedding. Info

I wanted a theme! And guess, what hive, I've got one!

Before I tell you what it is, I'll tell you how I stumbled across our theme that already existed!

I've been loving all the banners and bunting that brides have been DIY-ing here. I was inspired to use that same concept for our Save the Dates featuring a photo from our e-photo shoot.


Personal Photo. See the Save the Banner!

 After taking a closer look at both my first and my second attempts at making our STDs, the wheels began turning.

Then I had a conversation with Momma Kettle about our wedding favors. We're going the picture frame route. They will double as place cards for the reception. Not the most unique idea, but they are perfect for what we have in mind. We're getting them in gold and they will match our decor perfectly.

I started thinking about more DIY projects I could do and I settled on decor for the reception. As much as I loved those banners that everyone else was making for their gift tables and cake tables, I knew they were just a bit too casual for our formal/romantic wedding.

Then it hit me.

Image via I Can Has Cheez Burger

 Well, it didn't literally hit me, but it certainly figuratively hit me. Frames!!!

I could decorate our tables with all the pertinent info we needed and make the fonts/colors match our invitations and put them in lovely fantastic frames!

The frames will be fancy and lovely go perfectly with the fancy mansion on the wedding day. They've already been incorporated in a number of ways into this wedding, we just didn't realize it.

Personal photo from E-Party Recap

Personal photo from E-Party Recap / We'll be re-using these to display the menu at our wedding reception.

Personal photo from STD Reveal

Personal photo from STD First Attempt

Frames everywhere!!

Here is where frames can come into our wedding:

• Personal photos around the mansion on the wedding day
• Frame for the poster board that will have our seating chart
• Frame for table decor to identify where everything is
• Frames as the only prop for the portrait backdrop. After people take serious pics, they may want to get a big goofy, and I'll go with that if we get some assorted frames for this purpose
• Frame motif for the invitations (which are currently in the design phase)
• Frame motif for the program, thank you cards, etc.

Frames, frames everywhere. I can't believe I never saw how all this could come together before. And there are so many options with frames. We can make it as dressy or casual as we want, so we can tie in the theme throughout the rest of the pre-wedding events. I'm pretty excited about this! Can you tell?

Image via Wedding Tweets

Image via Oil Paintings Frames

Image via Art Gallery Frames

What's your theme? Did you decide before you began planning or did it fall in your lap like mine did?

Figuring Out Flowers - Our Second Florist Interview

This won't be a terribly long post hive. We had our meeting with the second florist. I was late, again!!! At least I wasn't 45 min late this time, I was only 30 min late.

But I have an even better reason this time. I did have to stop and pick up Grandmother Kettle again. But first, I picked up Momma Kettle from her job downtown. Originally, we were going to meet at the florist, but since I was in the neighborhood, I picked her up so she could leave the car with Daddy Kettle and make his trip home from work easier.

So why was I in the neighborhood? Well, I was having lunch right across the street from my mother's building, with Miss Sunhat!! We met for lunch and were both quite glad to have someone to talk to about wedding stuff who never got that glazed over, I'm-not-getting-married-so-I-really-don't-care, look in the eyes.

We shared stories of Mr. Kettle and Mr. Ball Cap both trying to avoid searching out their tuxes for the wedding. It's always interesting to find random things in common. But this post is supposed to be about meeting florists, not how awesome Miss Sunhat is, so I'm moving on.

Our second florist meeting was with Homewood Florist. The shop was lovely. I wish I had taken a picture of the outside when we walked up.

Image via Homewood Florist

That pic doesn't show the entrance in all it's glory, Imagine that, in lovely fall colors, with a welcoming arch 10 feet in front of the store.

We sat down with the florist and went over the details of what I wanted for the wedding flowers. I was right that the first wedding florist appointment made the second one go much smoother. The highlight of the appointment was when Mr. Kettle showed up unexpectedly. He's doesn't work far from there and so he came by just because. I love that man.

She took notes, made some suggestions, but mostly we went with what was decided with the first florist. She did offer some alternatives in sizes for the roses for some of the corsages and bouquets. They were very helpful suggestions.

We've gotten our quote from the second florist. After hearing about some people in the hive not getting quotes for weeks or even months, I was very worried about having to wait a very long time for our quotes. But they both came very quickly.

We're currently evaluating the two florists, and then we'll make our choice. The one thing we know for sure is that we aren't going to need to have the third florist interview. So, for your viewing and inspirational pleasure, some pictures of what this flower shop can do!

All photos via Homewood Florist

How did you choose your florist? Which florist should I go with?

Honeymoon Musings

Alternate Title: Be Still My Beating Heart

Mr. Kettle and I have been discussing on and off plans for our honeymoon. It's been a pretty big deal in our house because our choice to go on a week-long honeymoon right after our wedding affected lots of other decisions in the rest of our life.

We want to do this honeymoon right. We want romance, relaxation, and a trip to somewhere that will be warm in February while also some place neither of us have visited. We've come up with Hawaii and Puerto Rico.

Seeing as how Mardi Gras is such an important day in the course of our relationship, I thought it would be fun to extend the honeymoon to include a stopover in New Orleans for the holiday.

That would mean a flight to an island the Monday after our wedding. Staying there til Sunday (6 nights, woot!), and then flying to New Orleans and staying there until Wednesday, when we would fly back to Chicago and officially start our married lives.

For both of us, that's not too much travelling. It could prove to be too much money. Also Mr. Kettle isn't sure if he wants to use up almost all his days off just for our honeymoon. We're still discussing it, but I've realized what I want. And that is a honeymoon on an island followed by keeping our promise to each other to spend Mardi Gras 2012 together as a newly married couple.

I didn't even realize at first that Mardi Gras was so close after our wedding. I think it's perfect and I wish I could go back in time to tell Mardi Gras 2011 me that it would all turn out just as Mr. Kettle drunkenly promised.

With this idea now firmly planted in my head, I went online to begin checking out hotel prices in Hawaii. I figured I'd start with the most expensive option and work down from there til we found something that could work for our projected budget.

But then, I had the most unexpected moment I've experienced since getting a beautiful pink sapphire ring put on my finger. My heart skipped a beat. I've been trying like the Dickens to avoid any connection between our wedding and Valentine's Day.

But our honeymoon and Valentine's Day? Oh hell yes. I went to check rates at all three Hawaii Hyatts and my pulse quickened when I selected the start date the day before Valentine's Day. As a woman who loves her some holidays, I would be over the moon to have my honeymoon include both Valentine's Day and Mardi Gras. Those are two of the year's biggest holiday celebrations that don't require you to love and dine with family.

I could spend those newlywedding it up with my new husband. Lounging on the beaches in Maui, sipping hurricanes in New Orleans. Him having a great opportunity to play his sax and sit in with a band. I've demanded he bring his horn to our honeymoon because I'm clairvoyant and I know it will be used. How awesome is that? Oh please oh please God, make this happen for us!

Image via Honeymooners Review

Image via Destination 360

Figuring Out Flowers - Our First Florist Interview

Our first interview was so lovely! If y'all know me by now, y'all know I was ready to sign that day and forgo the other meetings. But, as usual, Mr. Kettle and Momma Kettle encouraged me to go to the other meeting I'd setup in order to "explore my options." Whatever, we'll go to the meeting and see what the other people have to say.

This first meeting was with The South Loop Floral & Events Gallery. They really have some beautiful stuff there.

I woke up late and still had to go pick up Grandmother Kettle. We didn't get there until about 5:45. The appointment was at 5:00. On-time fail. When we arrived, Momma and Mima Kettle were both there, discussing some things with the florist. They hadn't gotten to into though because they were waiting for me.

We dove right in and discussed so many things. I was in love in roses. I still am. There's just one hiccup. My desire for a sea of roses for the wedding...?


Image via eFoodAlert Blog

Yeah, well, that didn't seem to be a real possibility because roses apparently cost double around Valentine's Day. And here I thought they'd be easier to acquire because growers prepare for the need for larger numbers of roses. I wasn't too keen on paying double just to have all my roses, so I started looking through books to see what other flowers struck my fancy.

All I came up with at first were beautiful-but-out-of-season-and-therefore-also-expensive tulips. I know I tend to have expensive taste, but darnit, this was not a good start. Everything I looked at that looked similar to a rose but not quite turned out to be a rose just opened all the way, or just from a different angle. I finally buckled down and forced myself to be open to more options.

Mima Kettle had graciously offered to pay for the bouquets, bouts, etc. for the wedding party. This is because she's amazing! She likes the look of roses too and once she said she thought they'd make a good base flower, I immediately felt better. I didn't feel like I was starting from scratch with my inspiration for flowers. That made it much easier to find great flowers.

Fast forward to four hours later. Yes, you read that right hive. We were at the florist for 4 hours. Those people must've really wanted our business if they sat there talking flowers with us for 4 hours!! We talked bouquets, bouts, corsages, ceremony decorations, receptions decorations, aisle runners, and we had come to pretty firm decisions on them all.

I won't go into all the details here, but I will tell you what flowers I ended up choosing. I thought I'd go into there, pick out a couple of their pre-arranged setups and move on with my day. I should have known better because nothing we've done with this wedding has been off the pre-prepared menu options.

Image via Keisha's Creations Blog

The ivory-colored roses in this bouquet are called Vendella roses. Those will be our base flower for all the ladies' bouquets (including mine) as well as the groomsmen, bridesmen, and groom's bouts, and the reception table decorations.

Image via BuyFlowersOnline

This bouquet features green roses. I wasn't too keen on the roses at first, but I've been dying to find a way to get some green into this wedding. This will really look fantastic next to the other ivory, white, and purple flower options coming up. This flower will be in all the bouquets except mine, the best mens' bouts, and in the table decorations.

Image via Only Roses

This champagne rose will be featured only in the corsages for the Hostesses (aka female ushers, still sorting out their title).

Image via Landscape-And-Garden

These white cymbidium orchids will be appearing in my bouquet, in the mothers'/important womenfolk corsages, fathers'/important menfolk bouts, and in the groom's (increasingly extravagant) bout.

Image via Fifty Flowers

 This green cymbidium orchid will be seen in the mothers'/important womenfolk corsages.

Image via Hydrangeas Hydrangeas

These green hydrangeas will be making an appearance first in the ceremony decoration bouquets that will serve as a sort of altar. That arrangement will be doubling as the table decorations for the two parents' tables at the wedding. They will also be in the table arrangements for all the reception tables.

Image via Pictures 13

 These white freesias will come into my bouquet, the groom's bout, and the table decorations for the reception.

Image via 1 Stop Florists

White lilies will be just like the green hydrangeas and will be in the ceremony decoration bouquets that will serve as a sort of altar. That arrangement will be doubling as the table decorations for the two parents' tables at the wedding. They will also be in the table arrangements for all the reception tables.

Image via pBase

This lovely bright flower is called Status. In purple, these little babies will be everywhere! They will serve as filler in basically every floral arrangement in the wedding.

Now, I have an obsession with greenery and twiggy-looking filler, so we'll be having some sort of wintry greenery (that's yet undecided) that will serve as the greenery in all bouquets, bouts, and corsages. Also, the reception table decorations will have both bear grass and curly willow. Lastly, I want some sort of berries in there. Don't ask why, I just do. I didn't want red though, so we got another pop of green!

Image via Lubz's Floral Design / Calla lilies are not my thing, but this is a great bouquet that shows all the unique things you can do with bear grass.

 I had the following picture in my floral inspiration post. It was very hard to find a lot of photos online of what I wanted. Most have the curly willow outside the vase, not inside, like how I want it.

Image via Flower Girls of Tulsa

Image via Pen + Posy Blog

Beautiful winter greenery options, though I was looking for something that looked more like a Christmas tree...


Image via Save-on-Crafts

Green berries! I think they will look lovely in the bouquets, bouts, and table decorations.

 After typing out all these flower selections, I'm starting to see how we could have been at that florist for four hours. 4 hours!!! So much time. But there are so many people in our wedding party, figure out the different combos of flowers took one hour by itself.

The price quote they gave us was well within the budgets that we all had in mind, which was awesome! I'm glad I compromised and included more flowers than just roses. This first florist worked so hard, they are going to make the job of the second florist so much easier.

To sum up the day, here is a cartoon I drew just for you hive.

I don't know if it would be better to go in to the second florist with a fresh slate or to go in armed with my hard-earned flower decisions. I don't want to be closed off from more inspiration, but I also don't want to spend another 4 hours of my life, Momma Kettle's life, Grandmother Kettle's life, and Mima Kettle's life sorting out flowers again. We'll see what happens Thursday, I guess.

How many florist meeting did you have? Did you flower choices reflect your floral inspiration?

What's In A Name? Wedding Party Edition

Hive, I've got one very large and mixed up wedding party. I've got through it all before, but it's about to happen again. Bear with me.

I have a maid of honor, a best man, 6 bridesmaids and 2 more guys standing up with me.
Mr. Kettle has a best man, a maid of honor, and 8 groomsmen.
We have 2 jr. bridesmaids, 2 flower girls, 2 ring bearers, 2 ushers, and 3 hostesses.

There's been some discussion of what to call all these non-traditional wedding party members. My dad just calls them all bridesmaids and groomsmen. That doesn't sit too well with my 3 guys standing up with me. They're not bridesmaids after all.

Momma Kettle and I had a conversation about it that went something like this:



Another personal cartoon of questionable quality. Eventually I'll figure out the best way to color/photograph these.

We immediately saw that we didn't really see eye to eye on what to name all these members of the wedding party. We have to come up with a pretty firm way of naming these people so it will be the same in all our wedding literature. I'm thinking about wedding newsletters and of course the actual programs for the wedding.

Plus, I'd like the next time Daddy Kettle brings up my people, he doesn't call them something that makes them not want to admit participation.

I'm pretty sure we're definitely going to call our four main people best men and maids of honor. We'll just each have a best man and maid of honor. No one seems to be struggling with those titles.

But then there are all the others. Bridesmaids and groomsmen are easy enough. But should I really be calling my guys "bridal attendants"? And why would anyone call them "honor attendants"? Doesn't that take away from the maids of honor? Maybe I should just call them "bridesmen"? I dunno hive. Help please!

And then there are the ushers/hostesses. It would be easier to just call all of them ushers. Growing up in the churches we both did, ushers are a part of church service and they can be guys and girls, but in the wedding world, aren't ushers traditionally guys only? Should I just leave them as hostesses and ushers or should I call them all ushers?

I'd like to settle this for once and for all. I don't want to make people uncomfortable with their titles. Maybe there's some way to just generalize it and call them "Miss Kettle's Wedding Party" and "Mr. Kettle's Wedding Party"?? I'm going into title overload here. I'm sinking and could use some good old hive logic!

Planning For Inclement Weather

Most weddings happen in the summer months. June is the most popular month for weddings. People fight over getting the perfect wedding day.

Image via Gazillion Movies

I have avoided this issue by choosing to get married in February. Mr. Kettle and I have been very happy with our selection of wedding date. But there is one possible hitch to our happy wedding: winter Illinois weather.

There was a terrible storm this past winter. In Chicago, a little snow doesn't bother us. But when this storm was on it's way, people went to the grocery store and then went home. They didn't come back out for at least a couple days. There were no cops or buses on the street; who would drive a vehicle through a few feet of snow? There was no one out except Walgreens employees.

I didn't think too much about that happening to our wedding. I figured that through sheer will, the weather would be nothing but a bit of sunshine and light snow. I'd stand there in my pretty dress with the matching veil and perhaps a lovely fur coat taking in a few snow flakes and hopefully some wintry sunshine. Kind of like this.

Personal cartoon. Yeah, you all will be subjected to my cartoons now... I mostly put on the coat so Mr. Kettle won't see the part of the dress he doesn't know about.

But when Hurricane/Tropical Storm sidelined a few weddings, I started thinking about the real possibility that something could happen to keep my wedding from occurring on the day or at the location we're planning on. At our tasting next month, I will bring up the issue with our venue to see if they have any contingency plans they go with for winter events.

That is not enough for me though. I looked online and found wedding insurance. My best internet friend Google brought up four sites that I took a look at.

They are: Wedding Protector Plan, WedSure, WedSafe, and The Event Helper.

After looking at all the options, it's really best that I consult with our venue to see which one of these would be best for us. I'm not sure how much coverage we need and what our backup wedding plan is. Also, I don't know if we should be getting coverage just for postponing the event. Perhaps we should add photographer coverage, deposit coverage? And what in the world is professional counseling coverage?

I'm thinking worst case scenario, we can get over to my church which is right across the street from my parents' house and next door to my pastor's house. We could get married there even in a blizzard, we'd just have to figure out a party to celebrate with family and friends later. There's a lot to figure out, but I've got a couple of months to sort it out.

Are you getting wedding insurance? Are you worried about Mother Nature altering your carefully laid plans?

Figuring Out Flowers - My Inspiration

Our first meeting with a possible photographer is tomorrow afternoon, so I thought now would be a good time to share with the hive my inspiration for flowers. At just under 5 months (151 days to be exact), I feel like we're moving a bit slow on the florist front.

I felt a bit paralyzed and unable to start one major vendor search until a previous one was completed. But as soon as we made our decision on photographer/videographer, it was time to make appointments for photographers. I will tell you which three photographers I hope to meet with and choose from eventually, but first, my inspiration!!

Momma Kettle and I talked about at least as much as anything else we discussed about the wedding when it was still a vague concept in our minds. I knew I wanted lovely rose bouquets for me and the girls, and lovely rose bouts for the guys and corsages for the other important ladies. Luckily, Mima Kettle had this idea too. I love it when we're all on the same page!

I also knew I wanted flowers as the main focus of the table centerpieces. I wasn't sure how I wanted it to look until Momma Kettle mentioned the words "flower box." As soon as she said it, the words have stuck with me. I imagined a lovely fancy wedding version of the full flower boxes you see outside the windows of beautifully decorated houses and apartments. She didn't like this image at all, but I was stuck there and wasn't budging. I began scouring for images that could put together what I imaged. My idea evolved to not be a wooden or plastic box with dirt showing to something more like a bouquet in a box to a bouquet in a glass box.

I don't remember exactly where, but one of the bees linked to a website that showed a ton of pictures that were exactly what I had been seeing in my head. So many options, all in one place. I finally had the perfect inspiration to show my mother and our potential florists. I had visions of dead-on quotes from florists and my mother happily acquiescing to my vision with no complaints. Would you like to see what my inspiration/vision is hive? Of course you do!

All images below via Flower Girls of TulsaSouth Loop Floral Gallery. We found them when we were searching for an engagement party venue. This florist had within their shop the only arches I've ever seen that I didn't dislike on site.



I don't know if the glass is colored or there is purple water in here, but I love the color. My mother hates that you can see the stems, I love that you can see the stems.



I like the random arrangement of stems in the bottom, plus all the greenery on top. I really want wintry greenery incorporated into my flower arrangements.



White roses! I'm in heaven. Throw in some sort of berry and we're there!



I know I love this idea because I even like it with so much pink!



Various glass shapes and rose colors. Hadn't considered that, but I am now!



Various boxes that aren't just glass... Hmmm, maybe.

Who are the photographers I'll be presenting with these pictures? I'll tell you as we actually schedule the meetings. First up is the

And what do they have on the very front of their main webpage?

Image via South Loop Floral Gallery

This is a good sign. A very good sign.

I'm going to this meeting with Momma Kettle, Mima Kettle, and Grandmother Kettle. Between the four of us, we're sure to overwhelm whoever takes that meeting, but I know we'll walk out with a clear idea of if they can give us what we want in the price range we'd prefer.