Honeymoon Musings

Alternate Title: Be Still My Beating Heart

Mr. Kettle and I have been discussing on and off plans for our honeymoon. It's been a pretty big deal in our house because our choice to go on a week-long honeymoon right after our wedding affected lots of other decisions in the rest of our life.

We want to do this honeymoon right. We want romance, relaxation, and a trip to somewhere that will be warm in February while also some place neither of us have visited. We've come up with Hawaii and Puerto Rico.

Seeing as how Mardi Gras is such an important day in the course of our relationship, I thought it would be fun to extend the honeymoon to include a stopover in New Orleans for the holiday.

That would mean a flight to an island the Monday after our wedding. Staying there til Sunday (6 nights, woot!), and then flying to New Orleans and staying there until Wednesday, when we would fly back to Chicago and officially start our married lives.

For both of us, that's not too much travelling. It could prove to be too much money. Also Mr. Kettle isn't sure if he wants to use up almost all his days off just for our honeymoon. We're still discussing it, but I've realized what I want. And that is a honeymoon on an island followed by keeping our promise to each other to spend Mardi Gras 2012 together as a newly married couple.

I didn't even realize at first that Mardi Gras was so close after our wedding. I think it's perfect and I wish I could go back in time to tell Mardi Gras 2011 me that it would all turn out just as Mr. Kettle drunkenly promised.

With this idea now firmly planted in my head, I went online to begin checking out hotel prices in Hawaii. I figured I'd start with the most expensive option and work down from there til we found something that could work for our projected budget.

But then, I had the most unexpected moment I've experienced since getting a beautiful pink sapphire ring put on my finger. My heart skipped a beat. I've been trying like the Dickens to avoid any connection between our wedding and Valentine's Day.

But our honeymoon and Valentine's Day? Oh hell yes. I went to check rates at all three Hawaii Hyatts and my pulse quickened when I selected the start date the day before Valentine's Day. As a woman who loves her some holidays, I would be over the moon to have my honeymoon include both Valentine's Day and Mardi Gras. Those are two of the year's biggest holiday celebrations that don't require you to love and dine with family.

I could spend those newlywedding it up with my new husband. Lounging on the beaches in Maui, sipping hurricanes in New Orleans. Him having a great opportunity to play his sax and sit in with a band. I've demanded he bring his horn to our honeymoon because I'm clairvoyant and I know it will be used. How awesome is that? Oh please oh please God, make this happen for us!

Image via Honeymooners Review

Image via Destination 360

Choosing An Engagement Party Venue

In my last post, I talked about our search for the perfect venue for our engagement party. Because I'm a weirdo, I do things backwards.

Image: Vista PEAK

Or maybe, I'm just a rebel.

Personal Photo

Whichever it is, the point is that I don't do things as expected. The perfect example is this engagement party venue. We spent waaaaaay more time searching for a venue for this than we did for the wedding. We looked at three places for the wedding, and I chose almost immediately.

But we agonized over the engagement party. Momma Kettle and I looked online for a number of places. Then we decided to hit the pavement. Her friends gave her suggestions. We went to 21st and State to a lovely restaurant that looked perfect but is closed. So no free publicity silly closed restaurant that looked perfect.

Next we went to 21st and Michigan to a club/museum that was supposed to be a great option for an outdoor venue. I'm sorry, but you're not an outdoor venue and shouldn't advertise yourself as such if 85% of your outdoor area is mulch and another 10% is ceramic pavement and the last 5% is bushes.

Now hive, y'all know how I feel about people not handling their business.

Personal Photo of thinly veiled displeasure

Moving on. A friend of my mother's mentioned the South Loop Hotel. We couldn't find it (ahem... because she couldn't remember the address). So we gave up and headed south on State toward my apartment. Then we passed by it and did a quick u-turn to check it out.

It looked like my style, which I can't really explain. But it's a cross between classic and modern with an odd quirk thrown in.

 So, we went in to check out the grand ballroom my mother had been told about over the phone when she called earlier in the week. Except... there was no grand ballroom. There were only medium sized meeting rooms. We ended up strolling around the hotel just to see what they had to offer. We took note of their flower shop for later. I had finally saw an arch there I didn't hate with a visceral passion, so it was worth noting.

Then we stumbled across the restaurant in the hotel. And it was love at first sight.

Image: The Gloss

We strolled around the restaurant and the woman who happens to book private events there came out to talk to us. A hundred quick questions from my mother and I later and we were ready to put down money on the place.

I called Mr. Kettle to check to see if he wanted to see the place first. When I told him where it was, he said he knew that place and actually had just gotten a gig there for the next night (well that's the sum total of what happened in short version). I know you're dying to see/hear what the place is. So without further ado....

Personal photo: This is a shot of the main dining room. Not where we had the party, but definitely the first thing that caught my eye when we walked in.

Personal photo: more of the main dining room. Funky, but classic, no?

Personal photo: This is the entrance to the private room where we had the party. Something about this room just called to me as I approached it.

Personal photo: Even just looking super regular on a Wednesday afternoon, it looked perfect to me. Not much would have to be done to this space, thank God!

Personal photo: Gotta love the visual interest on the ceiling. And the window dressing were great too.

Personal photo: Close up of that fabulous ceiling. Love the colors, candles, etc.

Personal photo: What people would see as they're walking into the place toward our private room.

Personal photo: The bathrooms. Can you see the leather couch and mirror? Even this area is well-decorated.

Personal photo: Lounge area up front. As we spread out into the restaurant to cool down, this space really came in handy.

Personal photo: Right inside the entrance. As we were leaving, I kept turning back to take photos. Did I mention I love this restaurant?

We're having our engagement party at the L26 Restaurant in their private room in the back. Momma Kettle and I stayed for dinner and the food is fantastic. Since then, we've been back twice for Mr. Kettle's gigs. His birthday was one of those days so his parents and mine joined us and the food is really really really good. And the price really makes us happy.

I was so excited for this location. And it really turned out well. I'm looking forward to my post about the party.

Were you more excited for your venue for your e-party than your wedding reception? Did planning the e-party go smoothly?

Researching Venues for Engagement Party

Trying to find the perfect location for our engagement party seemed like a big deal, but only to me and Momma Kettle. Grandmother Kettle kept reminding me that she'd never been to an engagement party before so she didn't see the big deal.

I reminded her she'd just never been invited to one before, so that wasn't quite the same thing as it being some made-up newfangled party for Mr. Kettle and I.

I do think my mother and I made it more difficult on ourselves than we had too though. We went through several idea before we settled on one that worked.

Image: Maggiano's  /
Here Comes The Guide

Plan: Sit-Down Dinner At a Restaurant; like Maggiano's in Chicago

Why It Seemed Great: Imagine that picture except for an engagement party instead of a wedding reception. All of our family gathered for the type of food Chicagoans constantly drool over.

Why It Didn't Work: The cost is ridiculous for just the "appetizer" of our wedding events. And the environment is a bit too... stuffy... for the type of party we wanted to have ultimately. We envisioned our people having a great time hanging out, not being forced to stay in their seats for a plated dinner.

Image: G.R. N'Namdi Gallery

Plan: Art Gallery or Outdoor Venue

Why It Seemed Great: Easy loves places that look "industrial", like the G.R. N'Namdi Gallery in Chicago. Plus we could use our own caterer and decorations and music...

Why It Didn't Work: and liquor license... and linens... and tables... and chairs... and the costs began too add up a bit too much. It seemed that we at least needed a place that already had a liquor license as well as tables and chairs to accommodate what is turning out to be a wedding full of intimate parties for 100-300 people. Sigh.

Metromix Chicago /
Page for Andy's Jazz Club

Plan: Jazz or Blues Club, like Andy's Jazz Club in Chicago

Why It Seemed Great: Easy is a jazz musician. My mother and I were dying to incorporate that into the wedding somehow. These places have tables and chairs and are setup for live music, which is perfect for what we were once envisioning.

Why It Didn't Work: The cost for these places had to cover them losing business for that day. And we weren't prepared to cover costs for that much money. We'd have to have the party on Wednesday afternoon to afford it.

So we finally ended up with.... drum roll please... I'll just explain in the next post, lol.

A Flush Tea Photo Shoot

What's Flush Tea?

Taking that first crack at looking natural in the photographer was no easy task for me, but before we even got there, we had to find a photographer.

For some reason, finding a photographer for this wedding has been a major source of stress for me with the wedding planning. I didn't know this at first, so I dove into finding a photographer with the same gusto as everything else. Mucho gusto that is.

But then I hit a wall. I had too many photographers. I was getting follow-up calls at the most inconvenient times. I couldn't coordinate schedules with Momma Kettle or Mr. Kettle to set-up meetings. I began avoiding the calls like I was avoiding a bill collector. It was bad y'all.

Image: Lockhorn Vs. Lockhorn Blog / Cartoon by The Lockhorns


The biggest thing is that I wanted engagement photos taken. And I wanted to use those photos as our STDs. I had already made the bunting banner!! And I wanted to get these photos done by the end of June. I had to find a photographer at least for our engagement photo shoot.

I knew there was no way I was going to end up with a package deal for e-photos on top of the wedding so I let that go pretty quickly. The next job was to find a photographer who wouldn't hound me to sign a contract for all our wedding photos.

Enter Mr. Kettle to the rescue with his amazing, I'm-a-musician-plus-I-have-a-ridiculously-large-family connections. In the span of a week, I collected business cards and phone numbers from probably four different photographers just by going to family events and gigs with him.

We ultimately decided to go with his cousin who's a photographer. I went to his website and I checked out his photos. I wanted photos of Mr. Kettle and I, just being us with no embellishment. His photos looked just like that.

For his price ($300), we got a photo shoot. He was open to as long as we needed in as many places as we wanted. He also agreed to give us a CD with the images as well as access to his website to download them whenever. Gotta love that family connection!

I ended up getting an opportunity to make our moo cards and STDs earlier than expected, but he was on it. He had our photos available for me to use within a couple days. If you're looking for a photographer in the Chicago area, send me a private message, and I'll tell you how to contact him.

We decided on just one location for our pics because we didn't have a whole bunch of time that day. Mr. Kettle took a gig (which is a recurring theme on pre-wedding stuff days). I'm not gonna tell where we took the photos just yet, I want to see if any Chicagoans can figure it out!

I chose this place because it is literally my favorite place on the planet. I love that it's this escape in the midst of so much bustle. I can sit on a bench and read my Kindle and feel like I'm tucked away from the world, but so close to the pulse of it all. So without further ado, our e-pics!

All Images from The Nu3 Buzz Media

I started off incredibly awkward. Mr. Kettle has done photo shoots for album covers, so he was better.

Still standing awkward, making photos I barely want to use for our thank you cards...

What to do with my arms? So many decisions. At least Mr. Kettle has an amazing smile in this one. And of course, the wreath looks fantastic!

At this point, we were having waaay to much fun. But look how great our STD Bunting looks!

The bunting is really popping in this photo. Too bad we decided the kissy photos might be a bit too much, cause I really love this one.

My smile is still awkward, my hand it too pose-y, and the wind was blowing the bunting. I was feeling pretty proud about the durability of the banner at this point.

What was Mr. Kettle pointing at? This is the obligatory walk-toward-the-camera shot.

I had just started getting comfortable and actually be able to have a private moment even though a family member was nearby and lots o' passersby were noticing us.

I ended up using this one on our wedding website cause it's so playful. I had been dying to have my sunlight-streaming-through-the leaves shot. Yay!



Yeah, we kinda got into the kiss. Cue uncomfortable averted eyes. I do love this shot. Maybe I'll frame it and put it up in our house.



If I didn't like a turtle here, I'd like this shot a lot more. Mr. Kettle looks so protective and safe.

There is a crazy story behind this photo.

 Mr. Kettle is looking to see which bird had just pooped on me and whether he was still up there. We sat on the grass to take pics and a bird promptly pooed on me.

I thought it was a bug on me until I noticed the "bug" was soaking into my dress. Good thing cousin photographer's girlfriend was there. She helped de-poo my dress and we moved forward. Mr. Kettle told me I couldn't be a bridezilla because I didn't freak out about the incident or let it ruin the rest of our day.

More weird smiles. But I think I just have weird laugh-y faces maybe. I put this one up for the background. Can anyone guess what that is in the background?

This is a favorite. This went on the website, on our moo cards, and I'm considering getting it framed.

More awkwardness. I couldn't stare off into space. Who knew that was so hard?

 I do love the shots of us on the bench. The whole time I was asking Mr. Kettle, "where are you looking?" He'd respond, "at the light pole." Then I'd go, "Which light pole? The top, middle or bottom? I want us looking at the same spot so this pic doesn't look weird."

Turns out over thinking a photo can do that too...

Since we were in the park, we had to go to the playground. While we were pretending to be carefree and fun, we actually had a lot of fun.

This is the pinnacle of awkwardness. I didn't know how to stand. Apparently, I'm too pose-y.

Oh wait, it gets worse.

Mr. Kettle is, of course, a natural. Sooooo cute. Sigh, I love that man!

This was better, no?

I think our cousin photographer gave up on getting me to be "natural". We took hundreds of photos, so we wound it down and headed to Mr. Kettles gig.

The shoot was actually a lot of fun. I was amazed with how good some of the pictures looked in spite of my awkwardness.
Wedding Planning Tip #4: if you have a chance to take pics before the wedding, do it! Get comfortable in front of the camera, you will appreciate getting past the awkwardness.

I did learn that comfort with the photographer helps. I want all family and friends to be guests at the wedding, not vendors. So we're back on the hunt for another photographer. And by we, I mean Mr. Kettle and FSIL Grand.

Heating Up The Water - Getting To Know How The Kettles Ended Up Engaged

Mr. Kettle and I were freshly in love when I last left off. I was spending a lot of time in St. Louis where he worked. I was unemployed and making the most of my free time. I went to a lot of Mr. Kettle's gigs.

As our relationship developed, we quickly realized we wanted to be together, and likely wanted to be together forever.

The Super Bowl was a big day for us because that's the day we first began speaking of the possibility of us getting married in a very real way. We even discussed eloping. If I remember correctly, the only reason we didn't is because we were quite sure it would disappoint both of our mothers for us to not have a wedding. Also, we weren't even boyfriend and girlfriend yet. But what were we? We were rebels.



This is Mr. Kettle's rebellious stance.

Mr. Kettle was making plans for asking me in a very special way to be his girlfriend. He wanted to ask me on the anniversary of the day we met on July 2nd. Yeah, we didn't make it to March.

Mardi Gras is now a very special night for us. We spent the night together and had so much fun. I asked him to promise me we'd spend Mardi Gras together the next year no matter where we were. He informed me we'd be married by then so of course we would. I was surprised because it was such a concrete deadline. I realized I would love the idea of having our wedding anniversary fall before Mardi Gras every year.

A quick Google search later and I found we'd have to get married the first weekend in February to make that happen. Mr. Kettle and I discussed it and he said that date worked for him. When I reminded him that meant he'd have to propose at least by July so we'd have enough time to plan a real wedding, he said that worked for him.

I was flabbergasted because there aren't a lot of men walking around just ready to get married and not backing down from promises made while in a moment of drunken happiness. Mr. Kettle had another great plan to propose on the anniversary of the day we met in July. But... he revealed the plan to me accidentally one night. But yeah, we didn't make it to June.

We joked that I would have to propose to him first before he'd propose to me. I told him I'd propose, sure. But it would be with a Lucky Charms ring! Secretly though, I took this very seriously because I didn't anything messing up our plans. In mid April, I made Mr. Kettle a very nice picnic and picked him up from work. We drove to the park and had a nice lunch. I had him unpack the lunch and in it he found a box. And in that box?

Yes I did. I made my man a ring out of Lucky Charms. It took me an entire individual sized box of cereal to get it right, but I did. A needle, thread, and cuff link box can go far. I guess this counts as my first DIY project for the wedding.

I said some sweet things about how I couldn't wait to spend the rest of my life with him and asked him to marry me. He accepted and we both ignored how cheesy we were feeling and enjoyed the rest of our picnic. I did remind him that I didn't want to hear even one joke about us being engaged until he put a ring on my finger.

At the end of May, Mr. Kettle sent me to his jewelry store to get sized for a ring. He's very subtle. Very subtle. He also had me e-mail him some pics of rings I liked. That was on a Monday. That following Sunday, he took my dad, Daddy Kettle, out to brunch after church. Then he and I headed up for a Memorial Day BBQ at one of his cousin's house.

After the BBQ, we headed back to my parents house. I was really very tired and very hungry and very irritable. We decided to go our separate ways for the night, but before he could drive off, I asked him to wait. I told him we never leave things unhappy and so I would rally and continue our planned night. We kissed and made up.

I didn't expect a proposal at this point because Mr. Kettle can be super romantic and I figured he'd do some over-the-top romantic proposal. Plus, I wasn't sure he'd asked my father for my hand in marriage like he'd planned. Although I told him I wanted a low-key proposal that fit us as a couple, I wasn't imaginging that was the moment he'd choose.

While we were hugging, he asked me to marry him. At that point, Mr. Kettle was pseudo-proposing at least once a week. We'd talked about marriage so much that him saying the words, "I love you, will you marry me?" were commonplace. He gets emotional like that. So when he asked this time, I said, "Of course I'll marry you baby," without actually suspecting he might have a ring in his pocket.
Right near where we were back in October when we first decided to take another chance on each other, he pulled out a ring and got down on one knee. I was impressed because the ground was wet from having rained earlier. He told me some things that sounded so sweet and amazing at the time, but I can't remember for the life of me right now. I just remember saying, "Oh my God, you're serious this time!"

What I also remember is that I cried. It was unexpected for both of us because although I am very emotional, crying isn't usually one of the ways I express my emotions. I was amazed by the ring that he had specially made. It was very me. Very very me.


Pink sapphire, turned at an angle, white gold, pave diamonds. Oh yeah, this ring rocks!

We knew we didn't want a long engagement, and we were committed to sticking with our early February date. So from here on out, it's all about wedding planning!

How long were you together before he popped the question? Did you have a mock proposal first? How much do you love you ring?